James 1:12

"Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him."

Here Am I, I Am Yours, Send Me

"Pierced"

[chorus]
Make me, take me, break me, I am pierced
Make me, take me, break me, I am pierced

Though I am wounded and unworthy
Though I am selfish and untrue
You are holy, You're the healer
You forgave me and made me new
Made me new

[chorus]

Oh, this love, how can it be
That my God would die for me
For my sins, His wounds did bleed
Jesus, you were pierced for me

[chorus x3]

"Strong"

I will follow wherever you lead me
Wherever you are underneith these stars is where I wanna be
And I will lay it down, this old life of mine
I leave behind all the things of the world just to follow you

I'll be strong and courageous
I'll live my life for You, my only King
'cause You're my God through all the ages
Here am I, I am Yours, send me

When I fall down and I'm broken
When I strumble on the rocks and lose my way
I will cling to Your eternal love
When I'm weak You come to me, You give me strength

[chorus]

I will follow wherever you lead me
Wherever you are underneith these stars is where I want to be

[chorus x2]

Here am I, I am yours, send me
Here am I, I am yours, send me

SHUT UP! and listen.

I've been talking so loud and so much, that I can't hear what God is speaking to me.

However, I've been having these dreams, and I believe God may be telling me something important.... he has definitely caught my attention.

Fishy.

Literally.

I've been having dreams that I've been filling my fish tank with really pretty fish of all different sorts.

If I have this dream again, then I'll really be suspicious of God's possible messages to me about fish.

I need to stop talking. I find that the more I talk about my problems, and the more opinions and thoughts I get from different people, the more I get confused on what I need to be hearing, who I should be listening to, and what the answers are.

And only God knows... so why am I crowding my mind with everyone else's 2 cents?

(I've always known, He's in my heart, I'm not alone)

(Speak to me, tell me all the things I need to know, I want to hear you now. Make your wisdom clear, the words I hold so dear. Bring light into my dark.)

I decided to buy the NIV in mp3 style so I can listen to God's word while I follow along in my Bible. It's actually super neat... they use different voices for each character, which makes it easier to follow along and get a hold on the stories. I'd like to finish by the summer time...

... funny, I remember saying that last year when I tried this. I started around the same time, and my goal was to finish by the summer. Hmm... I'm determined to actually do it this time.

I need to do it. I need to hear God's word. I need to be connected more securely with my Jesus.

(Shaken like a leaf. Afraid to life my eyes. Afraid of all Your glory. Ashamed of all my pride. Then you call me in. To your holy place. I fall down. Down on my face. And I beckon you for mercy. I beckon you to forget everything that I've ever done. And I, I... I tremble. And I, I... I tremble. I am just a man, showered in your grace. You're the holy God. Your glory fills this place. And I beckon you for mercy. And I beckon you to forget everything that I've ever done. And I, I... I tremble. And I, I... I tremble.)

I'm 20 now. Weird eh? Still not sure how I feel about that. I suppose I shouldn't think about it as much as I have been, but for some reason it's a big thing for me. I have a bunch of dreams though, and being 20 makes them seem closer to reality. For instance, being 20, starting my own business seems like a breeze... I'm old enough to handle it. I'm really excited about it too. Having my own company... my own photo studio :D How cool eh? Snapbird Photography. It's super sweet.

OoOOo I got a new bass guitar. Now I'm really super excited to get really good at playing it... you know, I have to be as rad as my bass right? Haha. I named him Perry... he's periwinkle! He's perfect :)

I <3 Audio Adrenaline.

Man of God - Audio Adrenaline

Sometimes I'm a liar sometimes I'm a fake
sometimes I'm a hypocrite that everybody hates
sometimes I'm a poet sometimes I'm a preacher
sometimes I watch life go by sitting on the bleacher

But I've never been left alone
in any problem that I've known
even though I'm to blame
there were times when things were dark
and I've been known to miss the mark
but someone fixed my aim

Sometimes I'm a man of God
sometimes I'm alright
sometimes I lay down close my eyes
and pray to God

Sometimes I don't feel good
it's hard to start the day
it's hard to climb the obstacles
that sometimes come my way
if I make it, I'm a good man
am I a bad man if I fail?
I know I'm never good enough
so I let grace prevail

But I've never been left alone
in any problem that I've known
even though I'm to blame
there were times when things were dark
and I've been known to miss the mark
but someone fixed my aim

Sometimes I'm a man of God
sometimes I'm alright
sometimes I lay down close my eyes
and pray to God I'm ready for the night